Sex
PART 1 - KNOWLEDGE
To recognize what is sexual sin and what isn't, we must look to the Word of God. We must not assume our ways are good. We must always research the bible to find the good way...the way according to the the will of God. My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. Because you have rejected knowledge, I also will reject you from being priest for Me; Because you have forgotten the law of your God, I also will forget your children (Hosea 4:6). Once we know the Word, we must be willing to submit ourselves to it. This is the key to being led by the Holy Spirit, salvation, and joy. Only those who truly allow Jesus to lord over them can call Him "Lord."
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Fornication and sexual immorality mean any sexual sin.
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SEX OUTSIDE OF MARRIAGE
The Word says people should get married so when they have sex it won't be immoral. It's seems pretty obvious here that sex should only occur within a marriage. It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband (1 Corinthians 7:1-2).
Paul makes it clear that if we are experiencing an intense sex drive, we have two choices - get married or continue to burn with passion. Sex outside of marriage isn't an option. But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion (1 Corinthians 7:8-9).
WHILE MARRIED, SEX WITH SOMEONE OTHER THAN YOUR SPOUSE
Obviously, adultery is a sin. Just so this is clear let's look at some scripture. You shall not commit adultery (Exodus 20:14). Well, that about sums it up. If you want New Testament proof...Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God (1 Corinthians 6:9-10).
Adultery doesn't only happen through physical encounters. Adultery can occur through porn and fantasy/imaginations. “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart (Matthew 5:27-28).
The Word says that sexual immorality is the only good reason for divorce. A divorce not based on sexual immorality isn't justified in God's eyes; therefore, sex with the next spouse would be adultery. “Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery (Matthew 5:31-32).
If a couple thinks that living in an "open marriage" by allowing each other to have sex with others is OK, they are wrong. God establishes the rules, not us. Even when one spouse gives the other permission to commit adultery, it's still adultery. A spouse's permission doesn't supersede God's Word.
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SEX WITH SOMEONE OF THE SAME SEX
Once again, let's look at 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 that's mentioned above. Notice that homosexuals and sodomites are also mentioned. If we are unrepentant for such sins, we won't inherit the kingdom of God.
If a gay person thinks "it's all about love," they are being deceived by a false/incomplete gospel and may end up in hell for it. A person in a gay relationship has a really hard decision to make. Are they going to follow God's will or their own will? This may seem like a hopeless situation, but it isn't. By casting out demons, the cravings for the same sex can be removed.
Keep in mind the stories of Sodom and Gomorrah (Genesis 18-19) and the Levite and the concubine (Judges 19-21). God revealed the high level of evil in these towns through the high level of homosexuality. This is right before he destroyed them!
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MASTURBATION
Most people think masturbation is a natural thing and there's nothing wrong with it. This isn't true. When masturbation occurs it is almost always associated with sinful imaginations and fantasies. It could be argued that the following scripture refers to masturbation..."You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, pluck it out and cast it from you; for it is more profitable for you that one of your members perish, than for your whole body to be cast into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and cast it from you; for it is more profitable for you that one of your members perish, than for your whole body to be cast into hell (Matthew 5:27-30).
We must look at masturbation as demonic bait. If we bite, we may get hooked! It may seem impossible to resist its lure, but through the casting out of demons it is very much possible. Masturbation denies our spouse; therefore, it's evil. All sex should be shared with the spouse. If we deny our spouse sex, we are tempting them with spirits such as rejection, self-pity, frustration, anger, resentment, fornication, masturbation, and adultery.
If our spouse denies us sex, lean on the Lord and the Holy Spirit. By binding and casting out spirits such as self-pity, rejection, loneliness, desperation, worthlessness, hurt, sadness, and hopelessness, it is possible to crawl out of the misery. When we prove ourselves faithful through the torment, He will also be faithful and pull us through it. The torment will only be for a season, it'll pass! Afterwards, we'll have deeper insight into the matter because we've been through the fire. We'll then be more able to help others get through it.
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SEX WITH YOUR SPOUSE
Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control (1 Corinthians 7:3-5).
We can see that we are NOT to withhold sex from our spouse. As a matter of fact, we are to go to the extent of giving our spouse sexual authority of our body. Seem a little extreme? When we allow the Holy Spirit to lead us and when we cast out the demons hindering us from carrying out the Word, it all starts making sense and is good. When we let control, unforgiveness, offense, bitterness, anger, grudge holding or anything else prevent us from carrying out the Word of God, we need to recognize it and stop. If we can't seem to stop, we need to assume there are demons influencing us and cast them out.
A word about a couple other topics. The first is sodomy. We must know that sodomy is a sin. Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God (1 Corinthians 6:9-10). The other topic is oral sex. The bible isn't real clear about it, but this should be known...demons of oral sex have been cast out of people.
The Word reveals that in the end times marriage will be forbidden. It doesn't say people will stop having sex though! In other words, fornication will be the norm. Now the Spirit expressly says that in latter times some will depart from the faith, giving heed to deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons, speaking lies in hypocrisy, having their own conscience seared with a hot iron, forbidding to marry...(1 TImothy 4:1-3).
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PART 2 - SINNING AGAINST OUR OWN BODY
Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s. (1 Corinthians 6:18-20). When we sin sexually, the penalty for that sin goes directly against our body. Sexual sin defiles, degrades, and pollutes the body. The same body that Jesus paid a high price for and the same body that is the temple of the Holy Spirit. This makes sexual sin particularly disgusting to God. Sexual sin lets demons into our body that can quickly lead to physical and mental illnesses.
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PART 3 - DEMONS
We must keep in mind that we are ALWAYS at war with demons...always. People aren't our enemy, demons are. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places (Ephesians 6:12). Demons do everything they can to prevent us from being obedient to the Word and being led by the Holy Spirit.
Once a demon gets into us, that demon likes to open the door for other demons to enter. For example, lets say a future pastor has premarital sex and the demons of fornication and lust enter him. These demons will give him cravings for more sex. They'll also push him into pornography, so the demon of pornography joins fornication and lust in the man. Obviously pornography opens the door for masturbation to enter. Through the spirits of fornication, lust, pornography and masturbation, eventually the spirits of fantasy, imagination, perversion, sodomy, homosexuality, pedophilia, guilt, condemnation, and shame enter. When the pastor gets married, the demon of adultery enters through pornography. Demons are usually smart so they learn to lay low until the right time comes. Now as a married, well-respected pastor at a popular church the pastor gets caught having an adulterous, homosexual affair. The demons have successfully done their job. Not only did they ruin the life of the pastor, but they gave Christianity a black-eye.
This is how it works in the spiritual world. This is why the casting out of demons (deliverance) is so important. Deliverance should be on-going until we die. This will make sure we stay cleaned out the best we can. Disciples should strive to follow Jesus' lead ...the ruler of this world is coming, and he has nothing in Me (John 14:30).
A couple specific demons worth mentioning are incubus and succubus. Incubus attacks women and succubus attacks men. They often attack while their victim sleeps through dreams. These dreams may be very intense and pleasing at first, but eventually they lead to sin, perversion, fear, and torment. At times, incubus and succubus can attack while awake too. These spirits usually get into people through habitual sexual sin or a generational curse.
When we fornicate with someone we become spiritually connected with them. This is literally true. We form a "soul tie" with them ...Now the body is not for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. And God both raised up the Lord and will also raise us up by His power. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? Certainly not! Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For “the two,” He says, “shall become one flesh” (1 Corinthians 6:13-16). When we develop an unholy soul tie with someone, their demons can jump into us. Unholy soul ties have to be prevented. The ones we currently have need to be broken.
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PART 4 - FIGHTING BACK
It is absolutely necessary to know the Word and submit to it. If a wife feels frigid towards her husband, she MUST figure out why and attack the problem. Deliverance is almost always necessary. If a husband has an unusual lust for sex he MUST figure out why and attack the problem. Again, deliverance is almost always necessary. We MUST strive to do the Word and cast out all demons that are hindering us. Below is a general plan of attack...
1. Learn what is sin according to the Word/Lord, not the world.
2. Be willing to repent for such sin. Repenting means not only being sorry for doing it, but deciding to stop doing it in the future.
3. Cast out the demons that are pushing us towards sin.
4. Continually renew our mind (focusing on God) and maintain on-going deliverance.