Unforgiveness

Unforgiveness is possibly the most common hindrance to spiritual growth.

PART 1 - WE ARE ORDERED TO RELEASE THE DEBT

When we are treated badly by someone we feel anger, bitterness, resentment, hurt, and self-pity. Our soul feels entitled to these emotions so we don’t let them go. We feel that the wrong-doer owes us some form of penance first, an apology, money, etc. We can think of this desired penance as a debt the wrong-doer owes us. Well know this...whatever debt/penance we think they owe us, we must let it go.

Matthew 6:9-13

Therefore, you should pray: Our Father, the One in Heaven, Hallowed be Your name Your kingdom come; Your will be done, as it is in Heaven, also on the earth. Give us today our daily bread, and forgive us our debts as we also forgive our debtors. And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil, for Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory, to the ages. Amen

The Lord’s prayer teaches us that we are able to ask for forgiveness because we first forgave others. It may seem impossible to forgive someone. That may be true...without the help of the Holy Spirit. Forgiving someone doesn’t mean you condone what they did. It doesn’t mean you have to continue to allow what happened to continue. It simply means that whatever debt you think they owe you, you simply release it.

Matthew 18:21-35

Then coming near to Him, Peter said, Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times? Jesus said to him, I do not say to you, up to seven times, but, up to seventy times seven. Because of this the kingdom of Heaven has been compared to a man, a king, who desired to take account with his slaves. And he having begun to take account, one debtor of ten thousand talents was brought near to him. But he not having any to repay, the lord of him commanded him to be sold, also his wife and children, and all things, as much as he had, and to be repaid. Therefore having fallen down, the slave bowed the knee to him, saying, lord have patience with me, and I will pay all to you. And being filled with pity, the lord of the slave released him and forgave him the loan. But having gone out, that slave found one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred denarii. And seizing him, he choked him, saying, pay me whatever you owe. Then having fallen down at his feet, his fellow slave begged him, saying, have patience with me, and I will repay all to you. But he would not, but having gone away he threw him into prison until he should pay back the amount owing. But his fellow slaves, seeing the things happening, they were greatly grieved. And having come they reported to their lord all the things happening. Then having called him near, his lord said to him, wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt, since you begged me. Ought you not also to have mercy on your fellow slave, as I also had mercy? And being angry, his lord gave him over to the tormentors until he pay back all that debt to him. So also My heavenly Father will do to you unless each of you from your hearts forgive his brother their deviations.

If we don’t give grace to people, neither will God give grace to us.

God’s command of releasing someone of their debt goes back a long way.

Deuteronomy 15:1-2

At the end of every seven years you shall make a release. And this is the manner of the release: Everyone who has a loan to his neighbor shall release it; he shall not exact it of his neighbor and his brother, because a release has been proclaimed for Jehovah.

PART 2 - LIKE GOOD SOLDIERS, DISCIPLES WILL BE OBEDIENT

Often obedience is necessary before full understanding. How can we forgive someone who did something terrible to us you ask? Well, first of all disciples will CHOOSE to forgive simply because God tells us to.

Matthew 5:22-24

But I say to you, everyone who is angry with his brother without cause shall be liable to the Judgement. And whoever says to his brother, Raca, shall be liable to the sanhedrin; but whoever says, Fool! Shall be liable to be thrown into the fire of Hell. Therefore if you offer your gift on the altar, and remember there that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go. First, be reconciled to your brother, and then, coming, offer your gift.

Stephen demonstrated obedience under extreme stress. Stephen didn’t let the devil’s attacks draw him away from God’s will.

Acts 7:59-60

And they stoned Stephen, he calling on God, and saying, Lord Jesus, receive my spirit. And placing the knees, he cried out with a loud voice, Lord, do not make this sin stand against them. And having said this, he fell asleep.

Like always, Jesus led by example.

LUKE 23:33-34

And when they came on the place being called Skull, there they crucified Him and the criminals, one at the right, and one at the left. And Jesus said, Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing. And dividing His garments, they cast a lot.

How many times can we be wronged before giving up on forgiveness?

Matthew 18:21-22

Luke 17:3-4

Take heed to yourselves. And if your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if seven times in the day he sins against you, and seven times in the day returns to you saying, I repent, you shall forgive him.

PART 3 - FORGIVING OTHERS IS A PREREQUISITE FOR OUR FORGIVENESS

Colossians 3:12-13

Therefore, as elect ones of God, holy and beloved, put on the bowels of compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, long-suffering, bearing with one another and forgiving yourselves, if anyone has a complaint against any; even as Christ forgave you, so also you.

Jesus was crucified in order to give us a chance to be forgiven by the Father. He paid a high price for our forgiveness and He expects us to also forgive each other.

Mark 11:24-26

Therefore I say to you, all things, as many things as you ask, praying, believe that you will receive, and it will be to you. And when you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive it, so that your Father in Heaven may also forgive your deviations. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in Heaven forgive your deviations.

It’s plain as day...if we don’t forgive, we won’t be forgiven.

Matthew 6:14-15

For if you forgive men their deviations, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you will not forgive men their deviations, neither will your Father forgive your deviations.

Luke 6:37

Judge not, and not be judged, not ever. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned, not ever. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.

PART 4 - WE REAP WHAT WE SOW

We aren’t ENTITLED to anything. Nobody OWES us anything. Life isn’t fair. We can’t control other people. That’s just the way it is.

When wronged we will feel anger, frustration, self-pity, hurt feelings, revenge, hate, etc. If we look through worldly eyes and let our soul lead us, our world will be filled with yo-yo emotions. We won’t have emotional peace. We won’t let go of these emotions. Self-righteousness will make us feel entitled to hold onto these emotions until the wrong-doer pays their penance/debt. This is SIN.

Holding a grudge with bitterness in our heart is sinful. When we sin, God allows demons to torment us. Holding onto emotions like unforgiveness, bitterness, anger, hurt feelings, taking an offense, self-pity and the like is an open doorway for demons to get into us.

Matthew 18:32-35

Then having called him near, his lord said to him, wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt, since you begged me. Ought you not also to have mercy on your fellow slave, as I also had mercy? And being angry, his lord gave him over to the tormentors until he pay back all that debt to him. So also My heavenly Father will do to you unless each of you from your hearts forgive his brother their deviations.

When these demons get into us we will struggle with relationships, shut ourselves off from the world, develop disease, have pain, etc. Holding onto these emotions means our soul is leading us rather than the Holy Spirit. When the Holy Spirit isn’t leading us, healings and deliverance will be blocked. Because He isn’t leading us, we’ll stop feeling His conviction and guidance. Revelation of the Word will cease. His fruit won’t blossom in our life. The Holy Spirit will be grieved.

EPHESIANS 4:30-32

And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, in whom you were sealed to the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, and anger, and wrath, and tumult, and evil speaking be put away from you, along with all malice. And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, having forgiven one another, even as also God forgave you in Christ.

The moment we realize we aren’t letting the Holy Spirit lead us and we’re grieving Him, we need to make a change. We need to realize the mistake we’re making and choose to let Him lead rather than our soul. We’ll trust in Him to pull us through. We’ll repent to God for holding onto those negative emotions. We’ll repent for letting our own mind, will, and emotions lead the way. We’ll submit to the Holy Spirit once again and be obedient to God’s Word like a good soldier. With the Holy Spirit’s help, which includes deliverance, His fruit will start blossoming in our life once again.

Some may think that we only need to forgive other believers. Just know this...demons can enter us when we refuse to forgive anyone.

PART 5 - THE DISCIPLES GAME PLAN FOR DEFEATING UNFORGIVENESS

Know what the Word says about it.
Choose to obey the Word rather than our own soul (mind, will, emotions). This means choosing to submit the desires of our soul to the leadership of the Holy Spirit.
Forgive our ancestors who may have struggled with unforgiveness, bitterness, anger, etc. Repent to God on their behalf and ask God to bless them.
Repent to God for our own unforgiveness and associated sins. Mention people, organizations, etc. who we currently hold a bad feeling towards or have ever held a bad feeling towards at anytime in our life.
Cast out the demons in us. Bind the demons outside us. Loosen holy spirits to us.
Be vigilant. Make step 5 a consistent part of our life. Seek to always be led by the Holy Spirit. Life like a disciple.

Some spirits to be cast out…

Accusation, anger, arguing, bickering, bitterness, blaming, complaining, condemnation, contempt, critical of others, entitlement, fighting, frustration, getting offended, gossip, hatred, high blood pressure, jealousy, judgement, mocking, murder, murmuring, negativity, ought (cold shoulder to someone), pain, pride, rage, resentment, retaliation, retribution, revenge, ridicule, self-harm, self-pity, self-righteousness, spoiled behavior, stress, stubbornness, suicide, swearing, tantrums, temper, threats, torment, torture, unforgiveness, wrath.